Notes from Electric Pulp

12 Inquiries that got the gong.

In order to make time for sophisticated follow through on incoming leads, we’re having to be selective on where we’re focusing our time. The following list represents a few that didn’t make the cut (with minor details changed to protect the innocent.) Think of it as our own little Gong Show.

  1. I wanted to give you the opportunity to become a reseller of my…
  2. Now that it’s already built, what’s the discount rate for my own truemors?
  3. We need help getting our .NET app to…(work?)
  4. I’d like to launch my site in 3 weeks and have a design/development budget of $600. Can you provide me with a .PSD mockup of your ideas to help me make my decision?
  5. You probably already know who I am based on my previous innovations…
  6. I have a revolutionary new idea to discuss with you once you’ve signed my NDA. In preparation, please familiarize yourself with http://digg.com. I want a site just like that and have a budget of $2,000.
  7. We manufacture approximately 85,000 industrial truck parts and need an ecommerce outlet available in four weeks. I need your help convincing the company to spend more than $1,000. How quickly can you come out?
  8. … In lieu of payment, I could add you to my advertiser list once the site launches.
  9. I’m starting my own development business and would like to learn more about how you price your projects. Can you tell me how you’d respond to the following RFP?
  10. My paintball team is looking for a…
  11. We contracted the design and programming of our site through Elance but can’t seem to get it to work. Our budget has run out, but we need help getting it launched later this week. Can you…
  12. How much to build a YouTube?

No offense if you made the list. We’re still flattered that you’d consider us to build your idea, for free or otherwise.

  • Guys,

    I also sent an inquiry to you and fortunately enough it didn’t make the list, since it was quite a serious one. As a graphic designer I know more than anyone that customer and producer expectations differ and that it is difficult for some customers to understand why things cost so much.

    However your pretty list here is a mock in the face of any potential customer. You seem to be too flatered with your recent success. Shame on you.

    alex

    alex - June 7, 2007

  • Hi Alex. We get serious requests that we can’t handle. That’s part of being a service company – we’re limited by our available time. This week we’ve been getting some requests that aren’t very serious as well.

    The list was a mashup of some of the least serious requests, but I apologize if our fun with frustration offended you or anyone else.

    aaron - June 7, 2007

  • Hey Alex,

    For the record, we’re a bit overwhelmed and undersleeped. It’s been a crazy couple of days. Perhaps with a bit of rest we would have approached it differently.

    stefan - June 7, 2007

  • I thought is was funny;)

    James - June 7, 2007

  • Thanks James, we’re glad we weren’t the only ones.

    stefan - June 7, 2007

  • [...] Electric Pulp blog did a hilarious post called 12 Inquiries that got the gong, named after the tv show The Gong [...]

    Adult ADD Strengths » Gong Your Prospects - June 8, 2007

  • Fun – and seriously, Alex should consider himself lucky if he doesn’t suffer request like this.

    Claus - June 8, 2007

  • I spent 4 long years in your business – not just web dev, though – we were a “do-anything” shop. I wish we’d done a list like that; instead we drank too much red bull and went crazy. See http://flickr.com/photos/quaelin/142994483/.

    Joshua McKenty - June 8, 2007

  • Hi Joshua,

    Thanks for writing. Even with the list, we’re still going through some redbull. And coffee, and soda… :)

    stefan - June 9, 2007

  • I’m looking for you to develop something that I can maintain in FrontPage. My nephew is really good with Publisher and could furnish a lot of the graphics. I’m not too bad with MS Paint myself. Let me know where to direct the details.

    Paul - June 10, 2007

  • Paul,
    I can see where you’re going with this, so let me save you the effort. Our FrontPage developer position is no longer available. Thanks for your interest. :-)

    michael - June 10, 2007

  • You can call them the New Breed of Entrepreneurs.

    Carlos On Web - June 12, 2007

  • [...] Pulp.  They highlighted some of the outrageous project requests people had hit them with in 12 Inquiries That Got The Gong.  I can relate to them all, as I’m sure any web firm can.  As we all know, some [...]

    Prime Advertising & Design Blog » To Have Better Clients, Become a Better Teacher - June 13, 2007

  • hilarious – that’s so much for the list of 12, i thought it was very appropriate. as a developer myself, i receive similar questions sometimes and it can get to the point where it drives you UP THE WALL. haha

    Joe - June 15, 2007

  • by way of sitepoint…truemors…I get the humor…you should hear the offers I get for clowning!
    Seriously, though, you seem to have a great, creative team and I like your presentations…keep up the good work and I’ve got you bookmarked…

    Lester R Botch - June 15, 2007

  • …yep mine this month seem to be…
    I have a website already [its in Flash]… I can’t get my current designer to update any of the photos or product descriptions. Can you add about 500 pictures today and send me a quote to redesign it so I can….

    Tommy Logic - June 16, 2007

  • Funny

    I liked 4 a lot. I got another few:

    What approximately 3000$ ? I thought about something like 50$, you really just have to do the coding…

    (an email after a few weeks the site has been online)
    I’m still not on google’s first site for “lawyer”, why?

    We have a budget of 250$. Can you update our site? It’s -just- plain HTML… ah and we want to have another language version of it.

    so long

    Stefan Koenig - June 17, 2007

  • [...] you see that Electric Pulp, the company that built this site, has listed the dumb business proposals it’s receiving? Good news, bad news when you help Guy. Business no score link spread [...]

    Breaking Rumors, News, Truemors - June 18, 2007

  • Sounds a lot like every other job posting at Guru.com.

    “EBAY CLONE NEEDED. BUDGET $250 OR LESS. NEED FINISHED IN 2 WEEKS”

    Jason Macari - June 18, 2007

  • [...] Inquiries that got the gong… 12 Inquiries that got the gong. In order to make time for sophisticated follow through on incoming leads, we’re having to be [...]

    12 Inquiries that got the gong... - Graphic Design Forum and Web Design Forum - June 21, 2007

  • If you can’t tie your own shoelaces……

    Don’t tell the most sought-after shoemaker in town how to do their job.
    I’ve had the pleasure of dealing with folks who couldn’t tie their own shoelaces, but are quick to judge how long everything takes at how much it is worth for you…

    Michael Gracie - July 3, 2007

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